‘Tis the season to be thankful. As we move through the next several weeks of the holidays, I wanted to share a few things that car dealership folks are likely to be thankful for.
In automotive retail, your time isn’t really your own. Long hours at the store are dedicated to one thing: making customers feel at home. During the holidays, that mission takes on a unique twist as many shoppers come in to buy cars as gifts or to finalize a purchase before year-end.
In the midst of the hustle and chaos, we find gratitude in the little things—unexpected moments, unique characters, and quirky situations that keep us going and remind us why we do what we do.
So, to celebrate the season and keep our sanity intact, here are 13 reasons I’m thankful this year, from the perspective of a real car gal.
1. The Customer Who “Knows a Guy”
Thankful for the customer who says, “I know a guy who can get me a better deal,” but still spends four hours here. Bless their loyalty to free coffee.
There’s always that customer—the one who walks in with an air of confidence, casually drops their opening line: “I know a guy who can get me a better deal,” and waits for the entire dealership to crumble under the weight of their insider knowledge.
So, here’s to the customers who “know a guy.” May their coffee cups always be full, their stories always entertaining, and their mythical connections never stop being part of the dealership folklore.
2. Finance Approval Miracles
Grateful for the finance applicant whose credit score is a generous “work in progress” but somehow leaves in a brand-new SUV. The real MVP is the F&I (Finance & Insurance) manager, affectionately known as the dealership’s magician.
What makes it all worthwhile? That moment when the customer beams, ready to drive away in their new ride, and you know you’ve just witnessed the automotive equivalent of turning water into wine.
So, here’s to the finance miracles that keep the wheels turning. To the lenders who take a chance, the F&I pros who pull it all together, and the customers who walk out with a fresh start and a shiny new SUV. Because in this business, we don’t just sell cars—we sell possibilities, one miraculous approval at a time.
3. Factory Incentives: The Love Language of OEMs
Factory incentives are the gift that keeps on giving—if you can figure out how to unwrap them.
- A heartfelt thank-you to incentives so complicated they make hieroglyphics look like a Dr. Seuss book. Nothing screams gratitude like “up to $5,000 off, but only if you’re left-handed and buy during a lunar eclipse.”
- Loyalty rebates? Great, if you bought a car during a leap year while wearing mismatched socks.
- Seasonal deals? Sure, as long as the vehicle is white and you live in the Northeast.
OEMs sprinkle in catchy themes like “Holiday Bonus Cash” turning rebates into scavenger hunts. Decoding these offers takes an advanced degree, but once you unravel the fine print, you find the magic: they bring customers in, spark negotiations, and make every sale feel like winning the lottery.
So, here’s to factory incentives: overly complicated but undeniably effective.
4. Endless Warranty Expectations
Thankful for the customer who assumes the powertrain warranty covers their cracked phone screen.
If only.
5. Trade-ins That “Were Just Detailed”
You know the moment—someone pulls up in their trade-in, a vehicle they describe as “meticulously maintained” and “freshly detailed.” The exterior gleams (well, most of it), the air freshener dangles optimistically from the rearview mirror, and you think, “This might be a breeze.”
Then, you pop the door open and are greeted with an archaeological dig site that tells the story of a thousand fast food runs, road trips, and the occasional coffee spill that was definitely going to get cleaned up later. The pièce de résistance? A fossilized French fry wedged under the seat, possibly dating back to the vehicle’s original owner.
Grateful doesn’t even begin to describe our feelings for these trade-ins. They remind us that while our detailing crew deserves a medal, we also deserve a good laugh. The phrase “just detailed” has become less a description and more a punchline—a gentle reminder that not all shine comes from the exterior.
So, here’s to these “freshly detailed” beauties, a testament to the resilience of upholstery and the mysteries lurking in cup holders. They keep us humble, keep our shop vacs busy, and, most importantly, keep us laughing.
6. Tech-Savvy Customers Who Can’t Pair Their Phones
A shout-out to the customer who “works in IT” but still needs 45 minutes of your day to connect Bluetooth. Humility is a gift, and so is patience.
7. Dealership Online Reviews
Eternal thanks to the person who left a one-star review because “it rained the day after I bought my car.” Your contribution to constructive feedback is truly enlightening.
8. Customers Who Bring Backup
Thankful for the entourage of friends, uncles, and dogs who all come to “help” a customer choose a car. Nothing strengthens negotiation skills like a second baseman.
9. OEMs and Their Seasonal Slogans
Grateful for advertising taglines like “Winter Sales Event” that show our customers we really care about: seasonal metaphors.
Oh, the brilliance of OEM seasonal marketing. Nothing gets us into the spirit of selling quite like a good, old-fashioned tagline that ties in a season and a vague promise of savings.
The iconic “Winter Sales Event” is practically a holiday tradition, like eggnog or awkward office parties. What exactly makes a sale wintery? Is it the frosty price drops? The promise of heated seats for your frosty commute? Or maybe it’s just the idea that savings, like snow, only come around once a year (never mind the “Spring Into Savings” event right around the corner).
But these slogans work! Customers love them. They might not know what makes this sale different but seasonal branding makes the deal feel urgent, cozy, and festive.
And for us in the dealership world, it’s a love-hate relationship. Sure, we wish we could pitch something more creative than “Now is the perfect time to buy!” Plus, there’s a kind of joy in seeing how far the seasonal metaphors will stretch: “This Winter, Our Deals Are Snow Good!” Who writes this stuff? Probably someone who had too much holiday cheer.
So here’s to OEMs and their relentless pursuit of calendar-inspired creativity. They keep us selling, keep our ad banners fresh, and give us just enough seasonal metaphors to last until the next “Savings Spectacular.” And honestly, if someone came out with a “Groundhog Day Sales Event,” we’d still be here for it.
10. 90’s Car Sales Techniques
Be thankful for car salespeople who still believe the phrase “What do I have to do to get you into this car TODAY?” is the pinnacle of persuasive communication, as if time-pressure tactics haven’t evolved since the Reagan administration.
11. Hyper-Focused Automotive Engineers
Thankful for the automotive engineering teams who design cup holders so precisely calibrated that they can hold a thimble-sized espresso but immediately reject any container larger than a medium soft drink.
12. The EV Charging Station Labyrinth
Give thanks for electric vehicle charging stations strategically placed with the same careful planning as a game of automotive hide-and-seek, ensuring you’ll always be 17 miles short of your destination and developing an intimate relationship with roadside anxiety.
13. Automotive Digital Marketing Gurus
Praise for the automotive marketing teams who have somehow convinced Americans that a $75,000 truck with leather seats and more computing power than the first moon landing is an absolute necessity for commuting 2.7 miles to an office park in suburban New Jersey.
Happy Holidays to you and yours, from me and mine!
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